July 2008 Edition

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Summer brings with it so many activities, trips, and memories but this year it also brings with it the First Annual Heart of the Matter Online Virtual Homeschool Conference coming up July 31 - August 3. We have many amazing speakers lined up as well as vendors to meet all your homeschooling needs...and wants! You can check out the new conference site for more information and to sign up for the event. The schedule for the speakers and frequently asked questions pages are up and we are adding vendors daily.

Something else that keeps growing.... the FREE stuff! In fact, the free stuff well exceeds the price of admission so you can’t go wrong!

Also, don’t forget to sign up for our new weekly newsletter, which is delivered each Sunday. Our newsletter will contain a recap of the week’s posts, who won what contests, highlights from that week’s meme, freebies, and more! To be included on the list please subscribe here:

Sign up for our Email Newsletter

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We also have some new writers joining our team:

Karin Taylor of Passport Academy has joined Heart of the Matter as our new Reviews Assistant. She is currently in the process of lining up reviews for some fabulous Homeschool Products to help you out when you are ready to purchase products for your homeschool.

Luke Holzmann of Sonlight and Homeschooling has joined the team as a new writer. He will be sharing his experiences as a former homeschooled student as well as writing about his upcoming adventures as a new homeschooling father.

Kendra Fletcher of Preschoolers and Peace will be writing about Classical Education. Kendra is a homeschooling mom of eight, all of whom have either been, currently are, or soon will be preschoolers.

Belinda Bullard of With A Taste of Chocolate is a homeschooling mom, curriculum author, and the owner of A Blessed Heritage- Educational resources to foster understanding of the spiritual and racial heritage of children of color.

We are excited to have each of them on board and look forward to what they have to share with us.

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In this month's issue:

Masterly Inactivity
Learning with Reckless Abandon
Ways to Save $10 a Week
Becoming Like Ruth
What Season Are You In?
Summer - The Learning Doesn't Stop
Dependence Days
Defending and Defeating Evolution
The Value of Human Interest Stories to Public Opinion
How To Tell WHY Your Child is Struggling (Part 3 of 4)
Resting in Him
Singing In Every Season
Why Homeschool? Part 2
God's All Sufficient Grace
Articles for Dads
So You Think You Can Home School?
Last Words
Old Fashioned Homeschooling
A Planning, Organizing, and Balancing trip

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Did you know that we have a Heart of the Matter daily blog, which is updated daily and packed full of inspiration, encouragement, phenomenal resources, and weekly giveaways?

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Important Upcoming Dates:
July 10 - Happy Birthday Heather H.
July 11 - Friday Meme: What HASN'T Worked for You?
July 18 - Friday Meme: Field Trips
July 19 - Happy Birthday Lisa V.
July 25 - Friday Meme: How Do You Meal Plan?
July 30 - August 3 - First annual virtual conference
July 31 - Happy Birthday Mandy
August 1 - Friday Meme: A Homeschooler's School Supplies List
August 8 - Happy Birthday Yvonne

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This month's printables
Courtesy Karin Taylor
4 Week Subject Planner
Lesson Planner Reminders
Library Book List
Blank Teaching Schedule
Weekly Organizer

Masterly Inactivity

It’s hot outside, and summer is in full swing. For me, summer has always brought to mind vacations at the beach, lazy days at the lake, and a break from school. In other words, relaxation! One of the many reasons I love Charlotte Mason is her emphasis on the importance of leisure time. “Masterly inactivity,” as she called it, is meant to be time spent doing something to refresh mind, body, and soul. It is recreation at its finest: fun, unscheduled, unstructured time to enjoy life and appreciate the wonders of God. Go on a picnic, take time to read or draw, spend an afternoon at the pool, play hopscotch in the driveway, go fishing, or enjoy an evening bike ride together as a family. There are so many wonderful ways to incorporate a little masterly inactivity in your family’s daily lives . . . and summer is a wonderful time to develop this into a habit!

I often hear homeschoolers joke, “I don’t know why they call it home school, because we’re never home!” It is a blessing that there are so many great options for us homeschoolers these days: piano lessons, sports practice, co-op classes, tai kwon do, play dates, etc. The list goes on and on. All good endeavors, but we must be careful not to take on too many. Charlotte Mason cautions against over-scheduling because too much rushing around causes stress for the parents AND the children. When we learn something new, we need time to “digest” all that knowledge before we can actually apply it, so we should alternate our schoolwork and activities with recreation and rest. Children need “downtime” just like we do; they need time to process new thoughts and ideas. This is exactly why “masterly inactivity” is so important. We must prayerfully consider just how much we can schedule and do before we begin to compromise that valuable leisure time - but keep in mind that "too many" will look different for each and every family.

Charlotte Mason teaches that an essential aspect of masterly inactivity is “good humour––frank, cordial, natural, good humour.” Atmosphere is at least one-third of education, she said, and “the thought that any of our poor words and ways being a daily influence on a child should make the best of us want to hold our breath.” Amen, sister! She goes on to say that a child “breathes in unconscious ideas of right living emanating from his parents.” I don’t know about you, but that scares me a little! Like it or not, we inspire our children. The question is, what do we inspire in them? If we are harried and hurried, we are certainly not at our best. Our attitudes are contagious. When we argue, complain, or speak bitter words, our children learn from that:

“A nervous, anxious, worried mother can't have an easy, happy relationship with her child. She might be the best mother in the world in all other respects, but all her children will pick up from her when she's like that is a touch of her nerves, which is the most contagious of bad habits. She'll perceive her children as grouchy, rebellious, and unmanageable, but she won't realize that it's her own fault--not the fault of her actions, but the fault of her mood.”

Ouch! I know I’ve been guilty of this, aggravated about how grumpy my child is when my own bad attitude has actually been the cause of it!

On the bright side, when we have a good attitude, full of praise and gratitude, our children “catch” that, too. So Ms. Mason encourages mothers to go out and play! Every mother, and I think especially the homeschooling mother, absolutely MUST have time to herself. She needs time to revive and refresh her spirit. "Idle time to relax, and a sense of calm leisure in the adults around them is necessary” for children to thrive. That’s right, ladies, Charlotte Mason urges you to enjoy an occasional mom’s night or afternoon out! Heed her wise advice. Participate in some – dare we imagine it – uninterrupted adult conversation! Take some time to read a good book, simply for the sake of enjoyment, rather than for researching curriculum or homeschool methods. Dive into a new Bible study or devotional you love. Go for a stroll, visit an art gallery, or catch up on a few of your favorite blogs. Realistically, some days or weeks might not allow for a whole evening on your own, but a little creative simplification of your schedule should make at least enough time to stroll around the garden, or to enjoy one of my personal favorite activities, savoring a steaming hot cup of tea.

Take time to do whatever refreshes your soul and renews your mind. Listen to the still, small voice of God. Ms. Mason reassures us that “…faith is necessary to full repose of mind and manner. [God] works in ways which it must be our care not to hinder, in the training of every child.” If we are careful to listen, God does give us the wisdom we need to teach our children. And that's a promise I cling to every day!

Jamie is in her third year of homeschooling, and loving the mostly-Charlotte Mason style she's chosen. She is a joyfully married wife in a blended family, and knows that absolutely anything good she accomplishes is because of Christ in her. Her days are fueled by the love of her family and many cups of steaming hot tea. When she's not blogging or homeschooling, she's probably doing a photography session, gardening, or just playing with her crazy mutt. She invites you to visit her personal blog for more eclectic bits of encouragement and fun at Life and Love in Rose Cottage.

Learning with Reckless Abandon

Summer is a time when many homeschooling parents consider their educational options for the next school year. Some parents wonder whether they are capable of homeschooling higher grades. Other families wonder if they should put their children in classes outside the home. The good news is you can homeschool independently! Independent homeschooling can result in real and tangible benefits in the areas of academics, socialization, safety, and specialization.

"Challenging but not overwhelming" is a good description of the perfect job. The same is true for homeschooling, because the academics can always be challenging, but never need to be overwhelming. Homeschooling through high school is a wonderful way to prepare kids for a real world job. As homeschoolers, we can make courses challenging by teaching every subject at our student's level. We have the ability to use what works, or choose something different. And as homeschoolers, we can meet the specific learning style and interests of our child. By doing so, we can make sure our child will enjoy learning.

Socialization that reflects the real world, where kids interact with people of all ages and backgrounds on daily basis, is a significant benefit of homeschooling. After all, in the working world, not everyone on the job will be exactly the same age. My youngest son is eighteen, and he is currently director of our church choir. We joke that he lowers the average age of the choir to seventy! One choir member commented at how remarkable it was to see my son conversing easily with a senior citizen, and then turn around and talk just as easily with the teenage youth group members.

The safety and comfort of home is the best learning environment. There is no need to be fearful at school, because home is a safe and supportive environment. People have asked me, "What does homeschooling look like?" I usually reply that in our home it looked like my son lying beside our dog reading a book or talking to his grandfather about economics. In an environment that is free of fear, children have the security to learn with reckless abandon.

Specialization means kids can pursue their unique interests. Because homeschooling is a much more efficient way of educating, there is plenty of time for specialization, and the freedom to pursue a passion. Remember that in a homeschool, there is no waiting around, no standing in line, and no riding a school bus for hours. Homeschoolers really do have more education hours available in a day - enough time to specialize. Sometimes people ask me "How do you find the time to homeschool?" The truth is that we had MORE time than families in traditional schools. With our new free time, we were able to start piano lessons. When my kids were in public school, we simply couldn't squeeze it in. Regardless of your teaching style, you can have time for some interest-led learning. Allow kids to explore their passion - whether it's dinosaurs, baseball, or quantum mechanics.

Are you getting the most out of homeschooling? As you plan your next school year, consider the benefits of homeschooling independently. As you evaluate the many choices available to you, keep in mind the reasons why homeschooling works. Ask yourself questions about your child's academics, socialization, security, and specialization. If you take outside classes, will every subject be taught exactly at the child's level? Can you change the curriculum at a moments notice if it's not working? Does the curriculum match the student's learning style - and how would you know if it did? Is the class in a safe and supportive environment, free of teasing and bullying? Will it encourage healthy socialization, or mimic the socialization found in public schools? Does participation allow enough time for your student to really pursue a passion, or does it fill time with unnecessary busy work?

Make sure that YOU are in control, not someone else.

Keep a firm grip on those benefits!

Allow your children to learn with reckless abandon!




Lee Binz is a veteran homeschooling mom of two and the owner of The HomeScholar, "Helping parents homeschool through high school". You can sign up for her free email newsletter The HomeScholar Record and get your daily dose of wisdom via e-mail from The HomeScholar Blog.

So You Think You Can Home School?

Published on Heart of the Matter Online, June 25

This is my reality show…. Welcome!

For two years, my husband has been saying that I need to homeschool. Now I feel it is important to note that he likes to blurt things out before he really thinks about them. I mean, he is a loud, little Italian man. I, on the other hand, will analyze from all angles and then by the time I make a move the idea is usually out of style.

My husband says that before we got married he told God that he wanted a wife who would stay home and take care of his family. I told him that if that was the case, then we have both been deceived because I told God I wanted to be successful and productive (yeah, you know where this is going). So anyway, I am going to homeschool and this is further proof that God does have a sense of humor! Can you tell that I just wasn't that into the homeschooling idea?

Really, all I know is corporate America. You know, the "he said, she said" grapevines of loveliness? If you have no clue what I am talking about, you are blessed! Corporate America is a reality show nightmare. You will not see that show being broadcast anywhere but live. Thankfully, at the end of July this year my show will be canceled and I can start a new one at home.

Needless to say, the tables have turned and I have been nudged by a higher power (read: God) into homeschooling and my husband is now freaking out. Home Depot, Lowe’s, Harbor Freight, Wal-Mart, pounds of M&M’s, McDonald’s, 4-wheelers and many other amenities will soon be just a distant memory with our decrease in income. (Can you see me smirking?) This is going to be fun!

Here are the top 10 things new homeschoolers (or me anyway) want to know from you. I am going to ask because I would like to know and because no one else will dare to ask you. I have searched the internet but cannot find real, logical answers from real, seasoned homeschooling parents. So here it is:

10. So, I have purchased the whole curriculum that some experienced homeschooler has recommended. It looks awesome in my new homeschooling cabinet tucked away all neat and pretty..... Now what?

9. I like to have things planned out, but I have never been home for lunch. I think the kids will want to eat during the day. What do I do? GIVE ME YOUR WEEKLY MENUS. I WANT BREAKFAST, LUNCH AND DINNER! ASAP!

8. Construction paper is evil! Are there any acid-free, cost-efficient alternatives? Is colored paper necessary for preschool and 1st grade?

7. Thank God for glue sticks! Does liquid glue have any educational value that my kids will miss out on if I banish it? All they want to do is make a mess then eat it. Liquid glue has no nutritional value, does it?

6. What do I do when my husband is red with jealousy? (“You spend all day with them,” “When I call, you need to answer,” “Where is my tissue paper butterfly?”) Remember: I am married to a loud, little Italian man.

5. How do I wear out the princess before she can wear me out?

4. Will wearing uniforms help create structure or routine? We already have them and it seems logical. By the way, how do you get dry erase marker out of uniforms? Yeah, too late, I already washed it!

3. How do you get dad involved without it seeming like a chore? (Never mind, I can sit him down and let him make his own tissue paper butterfly!)

2. What do you do when the super hero turns evil on the fairy princess? They don’t cover this in our Bible curriculum.

1. I think I have lost my mind, have you seen it? Please tell me it isn't June already!



Andrea is a laid back gal from the south who has been married to a loud, little Italian man named Darin for 7 years. They have two kids: one thinks he is a professional wrestler and the other thinks she is a professional princess (yes, she wants to be paid to be bossy and prissy). She has recently given up the corporate world to step into a land of kisses and learning. You can visit her at her blog: The Honest Woman. Help!

Last Words

Published on Heart of the Matter Online, June 23

As I write this post, there is a 93 year old gentleman lying in a hospital bed in a coma, moments away from death. Some would say "Well, he's had a full life." And to that I say, "Yes, he has." Others might say, "Well, he is old... you knew it was coming." Of course everyone dies one day, but that still makes this day sad. Sad because he is my dear, sweet mother-in-law's daddy--whom she really does still call daddy!

This kind, Christian gentleman with a twinkle in his bright blue eyes has always been known to me as Mr. Boulware. While in his 80s, he could hike circles around me (and that's with me really trying)! Mr. Boulware was involved with Carpenters for Christ, volunteered at the Food Bank, and even served Meals on Wheels-- often to those younger than him! It was only very recently that he began to slow down. I could go on forever about his great example, joyful countenance, wit and wisdom, but what I want to tell you about are his last words.

He was admitted to the hospital on Father's Day for pneumonia. This past Wednesday as my mother-in-law was leaving for the evening, she reached down and gave her daddy a kiss and told him that she loved him. Ever the loving and cheerful father (friend, neighbor, gentleman in the truest sense of the word), he stoically said "I love you." (I'm sure he said it with a grin... he always had a smile on his face.)

Then he went to sleep. And he has been asleep ever since.

I love you. Most likely the last words he will ever utter on this earth. I love you. Three sweet and simple words that encompass so much feeling. I love you. Words that are sometimes taken for granted.

Have you ever thought about what your last words might be? Frankly, this thought scares and humbles me.

We homeschool year round and earlier this week, we started back with our lessons after having taken two whole weeks off. Let's just say that Monday was a rocky kind of a day. Not as in triumphant over adversity Rocky with a capital "R," but as in I can't believe we are still "doing school" when it is almost supper time! The kids were dawdling, whining (oh wait, that was me whining!), not paying attention, and just plain being difficult. Last words? My oh my, on this particular day it would've been something ugly and at a very loud volume!

Tuesday, however, was much, much better! The kids were diligent, cheerful, obedient, and even worked ahead in their assignments because they wanted to. Last words on this day? Great job! I love you! I'm so proud of y'all!

Do you see the problem here? Why is it that we can be so sweet with our words when things are going our way, but when there are problems? Whoa! You better run far away from mommy!

Pleasant words are as an honeycomb, sweet to the soul, and health to the bones. ~Proverbs 16:24

I should have that verse posted all over my walls to help me remember! Not just sweet to the ears, but sweet to the soul. That means it goes very deep!

As you go through each day, you will have good days as well as those horrible, let me climb back into bed and wake me when it's over! days. It is especially on those most trying days that you must try to remember what your last words might be. Could you bite your tongue and just not say those words? In that voice? With that look on your face? Maybe you can be like me when I'm actually being semi-mature and just give yourself a time out! Choose not to scowl. Choose not to yell. Choose not to end a conversation with a hurtful word and walk away (even if there is a teeny bit of truth to those words). It's not just what we say, but how we say it!

We can't live in fear but we have to be honest and accept that we really do not know how long we have on this earth.

Whereas ye know not what shall be on the morrow. For what is your life? It is even a vapour, that appeareth for a little time, and then vanisheth away. ~James 4:14

When that appointed time comes, will your last words be remembered fondly by your friends, your husband, your children? Or will your last words be looked upon with remorse, guilt, and sorrow?

I challenge you to start NOW. With your very next conversation. With your very next comment. Make your words sweet like honey! Make it healthy to your family's bones and good for their souls! You never know when they just might be your last.

In loving memory of Mr. John Boulware
February 4, 1915- June 22, 2008



Marsha is proud to be the Mrs. to David for over 12 years. They have been homeschooling their three rowdy boys in the Lone Star State for the past 5 years. When she's feeling like a slacker, you can find her drinking coffee, reading a book and writing at her blog-- and sometimes all at the same time! You can find Marsha at Our Homeschool and Other Such Happenings.

Ways to Save $10 a Week

You say that you can't squeeze one more dime from your budget for savings? Times are hard, groceries and gas prices are soaring? Here are some simple ways to save $10 a week, without really changing your lifestyle, but by just planning ahead.

• If you eat out, for a family of 5, the price of adding soda can be expensive. Drink water instead and save $10 (average price of $2/soda!).



• Plan your trips to the store, and save $10 a week in gas from going back for items forgotten.(For an average of 20 miles round trip, two trips to the store at 15MPG and $4/gallon for gas)



• Instead of going through the drive-thru for lunch on your busiest days, purchase a cooler/warmer that plugs into the ciggarette lighter. They run about $35 and keep food either warm or cold. Pack a picnic style lunch and save at least $10 (eating off the dollar menu for a mom and 3 kids)



• Go meatless. At an average of $2.59/lb for hamburger in our area, we save over $5 by serving spaghetti with just the meat sauce from the jar twice a week. The kids don't notice a difference, but our budget does.



• If you like to buy soda on the run, try buying it in 12 packs at the store on sale. At the average price of $1.50/soda at the convenience stores, and a rate of 10 per week, you are spending $15. Save $10 a week by buying it in advance and having it in the fridge (or your plug in cooler in the car).



• Try brown-bagging lunch for hubby 2 days a week, if he typically eats out. The average price of lunch can be anywhere from $4-$10, and just by bringing lunch two days a week, you can save $8-$20 a week.



• Consider starting a babysitting swap with other mothers. You can fill out questionnaires about things such as guns in the house, movies, snacks, pools, overnights, whatever is important to you. Each hour you watch someone else's kids earns you a ticket for a free hour for you. My sitter (although wonderful!) charges $7/hour. For a date night, with the swap, we have saved $28.



• Instead of purchasing a high priced item, try Freecycle. You may find that someone has what you are looking for, and is willing to give it away!

These are just some of the ways I have used to stretch our budget a little more. Do you have any others that I missed? I would love to hear them and share them with others!



Heather is a stay at home mother with 3 blessings to take everywhere with her. Teaching women to shop and save and get the most for your dollar are a vision that has been a long time in the making. She enjoys sharing her trials and triumphs at the local stores, as well as some good (and some not so good) recipes to help make those dollars stretch. Her column is a must read for the thrifty homeschool mom. Visit her blog at Titus 2 Woman.

Becoming Like Ruth

When the In-Laws Have Trouble Accepting Your Child’s Special Needs

The subject of Autism has brought out a number of different responses from those around us since the day my son, Xander, was diagnosed. I remember being fully charged and ready to seek out any information on the subject, and though devastated inside, I knew that I could not accept the ideas that we were facing "a lost cause." This would not be the end of the story for my son, it would simply be a different story. As I poured through the self-help section of numerous bookstores and on-line vendors, I slowly began to grasp that there would be no quick fix and no definitive answers on how to raise my child.

How could this be? Why didn’t they have causes and treatment solutions readily available? Why were doctors quick to medicate upon diagnosis? Would we ever be able to take a breath and stop fighting for our son?

Perhaps the most thought provoking aspect of this new path God laid out for us was when I started receiving emails from fellow parents sharing their testimonies. I think for parents, particularly mothers, it is much easier to discuss the progressions and pitfalls with nameless, faceless individuals facing the same scenarios in their own homes as they discover the new world of Autism as well. One of the most common issues that I read, almost daily, was the hardships these parents faced in sharing this "problem" with their own families.

I must admit, bringing extended family in on the diagnosis of Autism is an almost unbearable task. I imagine it is much like a psychologist or doctor delivering bad news to new parents. They are faced with instant denial of, “No, you must be wrong, you cannot possibly be talking about my child.” Until a parent is ready to accept the possibility that their child has Autism there is no way that any professional, despite their level of expertise and degrees, will be able to convince them otherwise.

This is very applicable where in-laws are concerned. I mention in-laws in particular because the most volatile of relationships can be formed when you marry into a family. The most vulnerable being a mother-in-law/daughter-in-law relationship. Let’s face it, we’ve all heard the horror stories from our girlfriends regarding this very subject. Perhaps there are many of you who have faced some of these situations yourselves. You may be wondering how earth to tell your mother-in-law about the world of Autism for fear of being blamed or of being told you are wrong. You may have even been told the famous, “There’s nothing wrong with your child — stop trying to label him!”

Take a breath. The fact is that these are people who have raised a child. One that you even considered marriage material. Whether or not you still feel this way about your spouse, in their eyes he’s probably pretty terrific. You may feel tired, rejected, dejected, and just plain fed up in dealing with them. Consider this: “For he does not willingly bring affliction or grief to the children of men.” (Lam 3:33, NIV)

Seems simple enough on paper, doesn’t it? This applies not only to the original diagnosis your child received but also to relationships, and especially to tribulations in your life.

So what is the answer? She’s driving you crazy and you just cannot take one more conversation filled with the many ways you are "doing it wrong." God calls us to be obedient to our parents, and "for better or worse," you have a new set. You have a mother that never asked for the role, who has a child already, and that’s a pretty heavy weight on any woman’s shoulders.

My husband and I were married in August of 1996. Young and in love there was not a single person who could convince us that we were doing anything wrong. Let me tell you, my mother-in-law should be sainted for what she had to accept when we took our vows. I was a force to be reckoned with, wild and immature, with a truckload of baggage. I can only imagine the look on her face when she realized that I was the one that swept her baby boy off his feet and was becoming a part of her family. Having three boys myself I'm not certain I would handle this type of decision with the same level of grace. It took many years to forge a strong relationship with her, and in some ways it became harder when I had children because the active role in her son’s life expanded to the territory of grandbabies. The woman who had scared her out of her mind by marrying her son, would now be responsible for the innocent lives of others. I literally cringe when I consider what my future holds in the ways of my children’s families expanding, especially if you truly "reap what you sow."

It was around this time that I attended a Bible study that focused on the book of Ruth. It took my breath away. Naomi and Ruth had a relationship that challenged all other mother-in-law/daughter-in-law relationships. It forced me to consider a friendship outside of the connection we had in my husband. In case you need a crash course on this subject: Ruth married one of Naomi’s sons; the other was betrothed to Orpah. Naomi’s husband and both sons were killed. Whether you know this story or not, I would like you to consider what a massive tragedy this story is. Naomi lost her husband and her sons. In the book of Ruth she even changes her name to Mara, which means "bitter." I’ll bet she was bitter. I would probably be shaking a fist at the sky myself. You can let your imagination roam to how it might have been to live with this woman after all of this transpired. Naomi ordered both Ruth and Orpah to return to their homelands and to leave her. In fact, she told them twice. Orpah said her goodbyes and left rather immediately. Ruth on the other hand had this to say, "Don't urge me to leave you or to turn back from you. Where you go I will go, and where you stay I will stay. Your people will be my people and your God my God.” Ruth 1:16 (NIV)

Back in those days this was a risky situation. Unmarried women did not have a place in society. This meant giving up the creature comforts of Ruth’s father’s house and living in complete uncertainty. I would call this absolute devotion. As a matter of fact, it was well beyond what was required of her during this time.

Ruth was obedient to her mother-in-law in many ways and God blessed her richly for it — she became the great-grandmother to Jesus. She was one of only four women mentioned in His royal line, in fact.

What does this have to do with my own mother-in-law? It changed my whole outlook on the subject. I suddenly knew what to pray for! The thought that we could ever be like Naomi and Ruth seemed to be an impossible task, given my history, but it was worth a try. Through this I learned to listen more and be less defiant. Obedience was the number one task at hand, with tactfulness being a close second. You may be thinking, “Oh forget that!” but I can tell you that God has the power to change your circumstances if only you will take the first steps. You must ask Him and you must be willing to go the extra mile by accepting your role in the relationship

Sadly there will always be relationships out there that will not mend, but it is important that your hands are clean in all of your dealings. "The LORD has dealt with me according to my righteousness; according to the cleanness of my hands he has rewarded me.” 2 Samuel 22:21

When talking to in-laws about Autism these same rules apply. It is important to remember that this is a learning experience for them, too. Chances are the feelings you had when your child was diagnosed are the very same emotions engulfing them as well. Just like the doctor that gives bad news upon deaf ears, they must come to terms with this new idea as well. Would you like to know what NOT to do? Do not force them to accept the diagnosis immediately. You had time to let this sink in before going in, both guns blazing, ready to conquer the world. They need time as well.

Do not let yourself get discouraged because they just don’t get it. They may not ever accept this diagnosis, but there’s a good chance that your parenting style didn’t exactly jive with their ways either. It always amuses me to see the looks on grandparents’ faces when the daughter-in-law announces things like, “We don’t believe in spanking!” “Um, no cookouts for my little ones, we’re vegetarian.”

You keep doing what you’re doing. Being an advocate for your child is not disrespect, it’s your God-given right that no one can take away. There’s a good chance that they will eventually warm up to your ideas, despite how different their parenting styles were. The most important issue to everyone is that the children are loved. Try listening more than talking.

When talking to your in-laws, take the time to hear their point of view on the subject. Through this you may recognize some of the factors driving negative comments. They may be scared, devastated, in denial, or they may just want to argue with you. Though the last example may seem a bit humorous, there are those out there for whom this is reality on a daily basis. In considering scared, devastated, and in denial, people can agree, kids bring these emotions out in all of us. It is love that drives them all.

Remember: You weren’t the only one who had hopes and dreams for this child. Some of the best conversation starters could simply be questions on their expectations. (Provided both parties can be kind to one another.) Prayer should be the first step in including the in-laws in your child’s life. There will always be extenuating circumstances that need to be avoided, such as being afraid your child will be abused in any way, or that you would be placing them in a dangerous environment. If your new extended family loves your child and wants the best for him, as you do, then the best step would be involving them as much as possible and encouraging a healthy relationship for the child’s sake.

Dear Heavenly Father,
I come before You tired and ready to give up on my family. We just can’t seem to see eye to eye. Lord, I know that You can see the bigger picture and that through my precious child(ren), You may have plans to heal my family from past hurts. I ask Lord that You work in me now, changing my heart to make me like Ruth. I ask that You open my (mother-in-law’s, father-in-law’s, parent’s, mother’s, father’s, etc.) to be receptive to my change and that You help me keep my hands clean in all of my dealings. Lord, I just ask that You give me to wisdom and courage to be an active advocate and a good parent to my child(ren) with special needs, and that I may bless You Lord through my obedience. Amen.

Angela DeRossett is military wife, homeschooling mother, and an advocate for autism research. Angela can be found blogging at Homeschooling the Chaotic Family and Memoirs of a Chaotic Mommy.

What Season Are You In?

What season is this? The calendar would say that we are in the heart of the summer. All of God’s creation longs to be admired, nurtured, and even respected as we witness earthquakes, floods, and tornadoes at an unprecedented level.

The media says that we are in a season of prayer (although they don’t consciously express it that way). With increasing Godlessness occurring at the state and federal levels, it is imperative that we pray for our country, its current leadership, and the leadership of the future. This prayer is not about a man, but for God to continue to show Himself strong. He is our true leader, and nothing will happen under the watch of either candidate except what He allows. We need to be lights in the ever-increasing darkness, not preaching the same rhetoric as the world, but lifting God even higher, that others will see us and cry out, “What must I do to be saved?”

If you are a homeschooler who follows a traditional school calendar, this is the season of rest, or at least it should be. The books have been laid away for a time, the lesson plans can be tucked away, and all that needs to happen now is rest and relaxation. Then, almost out of nowhere, with your heels kicked up, you feel a small nudge. What are we doing for next year? Are we doing the right things? The voice grows louder and louder. Are the children learning? Did I buy the right books/games/worksheets? Left unchecked, the mind spirals out of control, and all our fears and anxieties are magnified beyond our own recognition. “WHAT AM I DOING?”

Such was my experience during a mini-vacation at the beach last week. The kids were enjoying the evening’s high tide, and my husband and oldest daughter were feeding a flock of very aggressive sea gulls. I stood back and absorbed the family’s enjoyment of the beach and of each other, and I grabbed my camera to try and capture the moment. As I took pictures, I thought about what wonderful learning opportunities are present in our everyday lives if we’d only slow down enough to see them. Then I began to think about this upcoming school year, and what formal learning would accompany these informal learning experiences. Book cover after book cover crossed my mind’s path, and then I began to wonder, are these the right books? Am I missing something? With college looming over us like a giant shadow as the oldest enters her teenage years, I had a fleeting thought which sent my heart racing: what if she doesn’t know what she needs to know? What if she’s not smart enough for anyone’s college?

Thank God, I’m mature enough in my Christian walk now to know where these thoughts come from, and to speak God’s word over them. However, watching the birds, and not one of them emaciated, I might add, this passage hit me in an entirely new way:

Behold the fowls of the air: for they sow not, neither do they reap, nor gather into barns; yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not much better than they? Matthew 6:26(KJV)

I could not articulate the sense of peace that flooded my soul, but it has stuck with me ever sense that moment. With all due respect to the wonderful curriculum that exists for homeschoolers (including my own), there are places of growth that only come from an encounter with God Himself. The gap between us as parents with our curriculum, plans, education in teaching methods, etc., and the ideal for our children can only be filled by Him. Moreover, there are stumbling blocks and hindrances to learning, hidden sometimes to us and hidden even to our children as individuals, that only He can touch, pour His healing balm upon, and reveal. Over the years, I have had a number of chances to beat my head against a wall as I encourage, cajole, and occasionally scream my way past what seems like apathy or outright laziness. Only when I cry out to God do I begin to see His hand, His sense of time, and then the manifestation of my prayers in the natural. Something seems to "click" with one of the kids, and the very attitude that caused so much stress and tension just dissipates. What appears in its place is attention to detail, self-motivation, and a commitment to excellence.

As a clarification, I believe very much in academic wisdom. I believe that knowledge really is power, and I am a living witness to the data that supports the socioeconomic value of higher education. In the world we live in, there are keys to elevation, and education is one of those keys. (As an aside, when I speak of elevation, by the way, I am not talking about fame or personal glory; I am claiming command of more resources to touch lives for Christ.) Having said that, I pray that my words minister to you as they minister to me. As you search, as you plan, as you purchase, and most importantly, as you pray, be mindful that there are areas of learning that can only be accomplished through an encounter with the Great Teacher Himself. Rest in this knowledge and then use whatever you bring into your home for what it really is — a tool to further equip your children to be used for God’s Kingdom. Books will take your child far in life, but the missing cobblestones in the path will need the one intangible piece of your lesson plan — God.



Belinda Bullard is a wife and homeschooling mother of three, Belinda is an author and the owner of A Blessed Heritage Educational Resources, a literature-based history curriculum featuring African-American presence in history, as well as the contributions of other races to American history. A chemical engineer by formal education, she also serves as adjunct faculty for college distance learning programs.

Summer - The Learning Doesn't Stop

Summer

It's the season I looked forward to the most as a child, not because I particularly enjoyed the season itself, but because it meant freedom from oppression, er . . . I mean, school.

Finally, I didn't have to worry about sitting in a classroom for long hours, waiting for the day to be over, only to be faced with a mound of homework. I wouldn't have to deal with bullies and brats or the pressure to fit in. Ahh, summer.

When I switched to being homeschooled, I remember how awesome it felt to ease out of summer. Graduation didn't come as a big shock of freedom either, because I had already learned how to manage my time outside of "school." I was going to continue learning just as I had before.

Now that I'm homeschooling my own children, we've chosen not to take the summer "off." In fact, if anything, summer is the best time of year for education because communities are more active. There are more functions to attend, museums offer special attractions, and many places extend their hours during the summer.

This summer, we have decided to focus on one particular subject - Slavery.

I picked up a couple books at the library on the subject. We're currently reading about Addy, one of the girls from The American Girl collection, who struggles with leaving behind her baby sister to run away with her mother after her father and brother are sold to another family. Next month, we are taking a trip to Vermilionville to see how the people in our state of Louisiana once lived. It's "paused" in the same time period as Addy is in. Not only will it be a lesson on slavery, but also a lesson on our own culture and how things were done before technology spit out cars and microwaves.

What I love most about homeschooling is how one subject inevitably leads into several others. We don't have to separate them out like institutional schools do. It's wonderful to watch my children's eagerness and excitement over these things. We read a chapter out of our book each day (and they always want to read "just one more, Mom. Please!"). When we finish, we discuss what has happened so far. They cannot fathom why some people would be treated with such disrespect, especially since they recently memorized the golden rule; "Do unto others as you would have them do unto you." (Matthew 7:12)

They want to test out some of the foods people ate back then, which leads to "chemistry in the kitchen." I think reading about how the slaves worked in the fields has given them a new appreciation for our own garden. They wanted to try balancing pails of water (not too good at that, I must say) and dress up in disguises, like Addy did in the book.

By the end of the summer, they'll have learned so much without realizing it as we continue memorizing Bible verses, reading stories from the Bible, learning about slavery, exploring our culture, and caring for our home and garden.




Mandy is a former homeschooling student who has set out to homeschool her three young munchkins in an unschooling meets discipleship method. In her column "Delightfully Discipled", she gives a glimpse into the curious minds of her children as they follow their natural instincts to explore the heights and depths of knowledge and and are led though Godly discipleship. She blogs at MandyMom.com and Noggin News.

Dependence Days

"It is for freedom that Christ has set us free. Stand firm, then, and do not let yourselves be burdened again by the yoke of slavery."
Galatians 5:1

Do you ever feel like a slave?
A slave to what??
Bad habits, disorganization, or dare we mention...food?

There are times when we all feel the confinement of slavery. We feel trapped, we feel immovable, we feel STUCK.

July speaks one word to me;
~FREEDOM~

“The free man is the one whose choices have given him the power to stand on his own feet and determine his own life according to the higher light and spirit that are in him. The slave, in the spiritual order, is the man whose choices have destroyed all spontaneity in him and have delivered him over, bound hand and foot, to his own compulsions, idiosyncrasies, and illusions, so that he never does what he really wants to do, but only what he has to do.”
~Thomas Merton

What has you captive, what compulsions, illusions or idiosyncrasies that are destructive would you like to FREE yourself from this summer?

As we find ourselves in the middle of summertime, we have an opportunity to spend some time "freeing" ourselves from all that is hindering us from "running the race with endurance." Christ came to set us free — not free to do whatever we want, as that would only lead us back into following our selfish desires. Rather, we are now free and able to do what was impossible before — to live unselfishly. What an amazing thought that is. Live unselfishly and love it!

While I was preparing this article, I came upon a quote from the book God's Road Map for Life and it just speaks to what being "free" means.

"What a wonderful freedom and wholeness comes from meeting Jesus right where you are and receiving the revelation of who HE is!"

Where do we begin? Sometimes the slave becomes comfortable in this life of slavery and breaking free can be challenging and difficult, but always worth the effort. Begin simply by asking, What would you like to be freed from? What would you like to free your household or your home school from?

Bad Habits? Spend some time in 1 Timothy 4:12 to encourage yourself and your family.

Do you find yourself judgmental or temperamental? Romans 2:1, 3-6 is a great place to look, as well as 1 Samuel 16:7.

Too busy? Not busy enough? Look to Proverbs 6:6 if you are dealing with laziness and to Matthew 11:28-29 if you are feeling burned out. Oh and if you are feeling TOO busy, spend some time in Luke chapter 10 visiting with Jesus and Martha.

Do you find yourself trapped in materialism? Vanity? Meditate on 1 Timothy 6:17-19.

How about worry? Try Matthew 6:25-34.

It is in freedom that we have choice. The choice to become dependent in a month that celebrates our nation's independence. Choose to be dependent on the only source where true freedom will ever be found - God.

As the fireworks and picnics become a memory, let us look at July as a month of recommited dependence!

By spending some time this month looking inward at what has a hold on us, enslaving us and our households, we can begin to move towards freedom in the Word that remain true. He wants to meet us where we are. He wants to help us "strip off every weight that slows us down, especially the sin that so easily hinders our progress. And let us run with endurance the race that God has set before us. We do this by keeping our eyes on Jesus, on whom our faith depends from start to finish. " (Hebrews 12:1)

Freedom....we have the choice, we have the freedom to do the right thing, please God and find peace in a chaotic world, or stay bound by the chains that bind us.

Jesus said, "If the Son makes you free, you will be free indeed." John 8:36

Freedom and Independence have their place in this world...but a bit more DEPENDENCE in the source of "true freedom" is where we need to focus some energies this summer. I invite you to kick back a bit this summer and spend some time searching out what "enslaves" you. For each of us it is different. Identify those things and turn to Scripture to "free" yourself and your households from what "binds you." I guarantee that these fireworks, fireworks of the heart, will "burst forth" into the new school year.

Father,
Hear the prayer on my heart to be completely "dependent" on You. I know that being independent, means separating myself from Your Will. I want to "run" this race that you have called me to as a wife, mother, and homeschooler. You sent Your Son to earth, to die so that I may live in the freedom that is found ONLY in You. I want to be free from all that hinders me. Father, You know where I fall short. You know what I am a slave to. I humbly ask for Your help in stripping these away. I know that it is in You that peace and freedom live. I want that for my life, I want that for my marriage, I want that for my children, I want that for my home. I want desperately to be free in Christ. Thank You for the gift of freedom. It is a priceless gift that I can not repay, I can only promise to live in love.

In Jesus' Name,
Amen

Lori is a 4 year homeschool mom to 3. Currently a 7th grader, a 5th grader and a 3rd grader. Lori insists that when she was wrestling with the decision to home school, a gentle voice guided her with the words, "you know what you should do." Never looking back, accepting the challenges and rewards and CONSTANTLY clinging to THE ROCK..."No Storm can shake my inmost calm when to this ROCK I'm clinging." Lori hopes to impart peace and inspiration amidst the daily chaos. Be sure to visit her blog at All You Have to Give.

God's All Sufficient Grace

Last week was Vacation Bible School at our church. There were not any classes for Caleb's age (youth) and so he didn't attend most days. He played with the dogs at home and enjoyed the quiet time alone. The last day, however, he wanted to "help" out in the younger boys class so I said that would be okay, IF the teacher agreed. Everything went sailing along smoothly until Caleb decided it would be cool to hear the click clack of his 3-D glasses in the fan. He assumed it would be just like a card in the spokes of his bicycle tire. Unfortunately, the powerful motor of the fan grabbed the glasses and ripped them into three pieces! NOT COOL! Especially NOT COOL to a kid with Asperger's Syndrome! Our new church family was pleasured with experiencing a full-force melt down. Oh, what will they think of us now, I wondered? Thankfully, though, this church has had several autistic children in their midst and they have an understanding spirit.

I knew I had to get to the bottom of the matter. Why was he having a meltdown? What triggered it? He hasn't had one in a while and glasses being torn apart by the fan, when a replacement pair was offered to him, seemed to make the meltdown a bit overboard. I started asking questions only to be met with glares and defiance. This is not an option in our home and our son knows it. At 13 years old, and towering at 6'1'', I can't afford to let this be an option or all respect for my authority will dissipate. Caleb knows this, but it doesn't stop him from occasionally trying to test the boundaries either. Patience is my friend in situations like this and so I sat Caleb in a chair by himself and walked into the kitchen for a few minutes to help prepare some snacks for the younger classes. It gave us both the patience we needed. I needed to think through my questions clearly. He needed to calm down enough to be willing to listen.

After a few moments, I went and asked Caleb to follow me outside so we could sit and talk away from everyone. I knew as long as we were around people that he would not open up to me. After we got outside and started talking, I was completely knocked over by his answer when I asked why he had the meltdown. He was mad at himself for being what he considered dumb. Plain and simple! He was mad that he was too dumb to figure out the fan would eat the glasses and that they wouldn't be able to be repaired. My boy thinks he's dumb?! Huh?! The boy who read Tolkien at 8 years old and understood him? The boy who can memorize line upon line upon line of movie scripts and book passages? The boy who not only learned his books of the Bible forward but backward as well, just to encourage the other boys in his AWANA club? He thinks he's dumb?! My brain cells died and a whole portion of my thought process dove off a cliff as I tried to think of what to say. My boy thinks he's dumb? I honestly could not fathom how to even answer that because it is so far from the truth. I was at a loss for what words of encouragement I could use. Then he said "I just want MY glasses to be fixed and they can't be."

HA! I am mommy... hear me roar! With a bit of tape and some thinking skills (miraculously my thought processes got back in gear), I could get those glasses fixed and show him that everything doesn't have to always end bad just cause it seems that we have ruined it. Back in the kitchen we got out the tools I would need: broken glasses - check, tape - check, scissors - check. I set to putting the 3-D glasses back to as close to new as possible only to have Caleb amazed that they were able to really be fixed. He looked at me and said he was glad that God gave him a mom like me. I looked up at the now sweet face looking down at me with eyes of wonder, and asked "Why wouldn't God give you a mom like me? But, more importantly, why wouldn't God give me a son like you?"

I have thought about those questions several times this weekend. When I was a baby Christian and things happened I would often question God and his love for me. Now that I am more mature in my faith, I understand how the puzzle pieces of life fit together for the honor of God. We don't let Caleb give in to his "disability" but he does have one. He does have special needs that need attention. Why wouldn't God give him a mom who was patient and a fixer of things big and small? Besides, what on earth makes me so special that I deserve to have all perfect children with no challenges in raising them? Don't we all have challenges in some form or another?! Better yet, what makes me so special that God chose to entrust me with one of His special children? That is the question I think about the most!

There isn't any deep, thought-out wisdom that provides answers to these questions. Honestly, they are quite simple. My Father in heaven has equipped me with everything I need to take care of my child. He has also equipped my child with everything he needs to succeed.

Philippians 4:13 says "I can do all things through Him who strengthens me."

I cherish this promise from God that He gives me strength to be a good mom, who is patient and loving towards all my children.

Another verse that gives me strength daily is 2 Corinthians 12:9"But he said to me, 'My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.'"

Oh, I'm plenty weak! There have been days that we struggled with multiple meltdowns, school work not even started let alone finished, sensory issues with lights and noises and touch all jumbled together in one single day, and yet, God's grace is sufficient. His power is made extra perfect on those days because he gets to take Caleb's weakness and mine, too! Thoseare the days that I sit down at the end of the day and my prayers are full of praise. It would be easy to have them be full of whining and crying about "why me?" or "why us?" but it is so much better to simply say Thank you, Jesus! The day is done and we are all still alive and the trials of the day have passed. Yes, He can do all things, and yes, His grace is sufficient! Neither Caleb nor I would make it through most days if we didn't both rely on these promises from God! I'm so glad He trusted me with my special child and He gave me promises to remember along the way!



Sallie is an off-again, on-again homeschooling mom to her 4 children, ranging from elementary to high school. In her writings, she discusses the challenges of homeschooling a child with disabilities and offers insight to those who sometimes feel all alone in a round hole world. Please visit her at Seaside Tales.

Defending and Defeating Evolution

Just hearing the word evolution creates consternation on the face of Christian homeschoolers. We know the Bible is true and that this insidious lie has permeated every culture, casting shadows over the entire world. But are you aware of the fact that some of the teachings of evolution are accurate, valid science that we can and should support? It’s important that we understand this so that we can readily explain our position to others in an effort to shed light on what it is about evolution that we don’t support.

It all comes down to microevolution versus macroevolution. Natural selection, or microevolution, is legitimate and supported by the scientific method. Yet, when we claim that we don’t believe in evolution, scientists assume that we do not believe in natural selection (which is proven). To them, it sounds like we are claiming that the earth is flat. The truth is, we believe in evolutionary teaching that has scientific support and evidence to prove its validity. Evolution simply means change. We believe that animals have changed over time. Where we differ is on how much they have changed. We simply do not believe in the teachings of evolution that have no support or evidence, otherwise known as macroevolution. Macroevolution has never been verified, and has actually been disproved through many scientific studies.

Microevolution

Let’s take a look at microevolution. Microevolution happens when a part of an animal, like the color, shape or size of their body parts, changes over time. Now, they don’t really change on one particular animal – the animal group evolves its features over time. The animal’s body part doesn’t become something else – a fin doesn’t become a wing or legs, and feathers don’t become hair, but the animal group might be bigger or smaller, with longer legs or a shorter tail. Let me explain it this way: Pretend there are birds living in Hawaii that have long bills and enjoy eating nectar from flowers. Every bird is born with a long bill, but some just naturally have a bill that is a few centimeters longer than another, just like there are always variations in people. Two sisters might be born with curly hair, but one has hair that is just a little curlier than the other. That’s a natural variation encoded in the DNA. All animals have natural variations and DNA for different features. Back to the birds: Let’s imagine that these birds drink nectar and there are more flowers in Hawaii with longer tubes; only those birds with longer bills can reach inside these tubes. It is a fact that the more an animal eats, the more offspring they will have. If they don’t eat as much, they don’t produce as many offspring. So, the birds with longer bills get more food and produce more young. These young will probably have longer bills, but might not because the genetic code still allows for shorter bills. Over time, however, longer bills will prevail as this feature is naturally selected to be the best to survive. There will be fewer birds with short bills with which to mate, and before long, the longer billed birds will have dominated the gene pool in the area. Slowly, the birds with shorter bills will not be as abundant, and soon no longer exist as they mate with longer billed birds and produce longer billed offspring.

Thus, over many years, the only birds you see around have extremely long bills. Did the bills change? Yes and no. We say they “evolved” longer bills. We do not have a problem with this sort of evolution. This is called microevolution or natural selection. Over time, the beaks that were best suited for the environment were naturally selected to survive and thrive in that environment. We can find evidence for this sort of evolution and it will show up in the fossil record; the bones, from hundreds of years back, will show shorter beaks. Then, as we find newer bones, they show longer and longer beaks. We can see evidence for the transition from shorter beaks to longer beaks: transitional bones of transitional creatures. Yet, the beak remained a beak. It did not evolve from something else into a beak. It was always a beak. And the bird had within its DNA the ability to produce birds with longer beaks, but it couldn’t produce a mouth or teeth, because the genes inside the bird only allow it to produce bird parts.

Sadly, some make a giant leap of logic and claim that natural selection proves macroevolution, or plain ole’ evolution. They assert that because a bird’s beak can change in size over time (and we know it didn’t really change on any one bird), that a fish can change into a man, or a lizard can change into a bird. This is like saying that because we see a small mound that has ants living inside it, giant mountains must have been made by similar creatures. Macroevolution (or just evolution) is the name given to this giant leap from truth to a lie. Macro means big, and evolution means change. Macroevolution is an impossibly big change for which there is no evidence. It would require a change in DNA. It would require mutations to the DNA. Positive mutations! The kind which we never see in nature. We only see negative mutations, or downward mutations. Mutations are mistakes and we do not see positive mistakes in nature. For the DNA to change that much, there would have to be thousands upon thousands of mistakes over time in one animals species, and each one of those mistakes would all be positive and become dominant in the entire species. Impossible.

Often in school textbooks, microevolution is explained, and all the evidence is given to the students. Then, after the kids come to understand how microevolution works, the textbook tells the kids that this is how evolution works, and how we evolved from apes. Do you see how tricky that is? And many, many people, without thinking, just swallow it hook, line and sinker.


One quite amazing about some scientists' belief in evolution is that there have never, ever been any transitional creatures found between man and apes or dinosaurs and birds. There have never been any transitional creatures found for any animal species. Though millions of fossils have been unearthed, none shows a half transformed or changing body from one creature into another creature. Yet, for two hundred years, some chose to believe in the theory of evolution without one shred of evidence.

You are probably wondering why some people believe this when the evidence does not confirm their beliefs. Well, if you didn’t believe in God, and you were a scientist, you would need some explanation for why we are here. The reality is that these people want to believe it. They’ve been told it’s true and they want to believe it’s true. Frankly, when we want to believe something, it’s very difficult to change our minds. Further, once they have embraced an idea, it’s hard to convince them otherwise – especially if the alternative requires they consider God as a reality. This would change their entire lives, and that’s a scary proposition for them. It’s easier for them to deny the facts and evidence and stick with their current beliefs. Think of it this way: If someone today told you that the earth is really a flat, round circle, you wouldn’t be able to believe that. They would have to show you a lot of evidence, and you still might not believe it. No matter how convincing they were, you would maintain in your belief system that the earth is a sphere. So, don’t be so hard on those who believe in evolution. Everyone has a hard time changing their beliefs once they really believe something. Truly, it requires faith – given only by the Author of our faith, Jesus Christ – to accept the truth of the Bible and the story of Creation. The best thing we can do it pray for them. God can do more with our prayers than with all our wise and persuasive words.

Jeannie Fulbright is the author of Apologia’s Elementary Science, Exploring Creation with Astronomy, Exploring Creation with Botany and Exploring Creation with Zoology 1, 2, and 3. Jeannie homeschools her four children (ages 7 – 14) in Atlanta, Georgia. To learn more about her books or read her many articles, sign up for her homeschool encouragement newsletter, visit her website at http://www.jeanniefulbright.com/.

How To Tell WHY Your Child is Struggling (Part 3 of 4)

(This is part 3 of a 4 part series)

Many educators who follow brain research believe that there are four "Learning Gates" that need to be properly functioning for a child to have an easy time learning.

The Four "Learning Gates" are:

1. Visual processing

2. Visual/motor processing (writing)

3. Auditory processing

4. Focus/attention processing

This article will review information regarding the third "learning gate:"

Auditory Processing

Your child may be struggling with auditory processing dysfunction if he or she exhibits the following difficulties:

Difficulty remembering sight words, including;

• Trouble retrieving names of letters, words, people, and things
• Laboring over verbal expression.

Difficulty with phonics, including:

• Trouble remembering sounds of letter combinations such as “au,” “oi”
• Difficulty applying phonics rules in a reading setting
• Sounding out the same word over and over in the same reading passage

Spelling difficulties, including:

• Trouble spelling phonetically (the child may spell “team” as “tie” or “went” as “wat”)
• Spelling the same word differently each time

Difficulty sequencing sounds, including:

• Trouble learning and retaining days of the week and months
• The child guesses at words because reading longer words is very hard
• The child puts extra sounds in a word (ie., contribution becomes contribu’ta’tion), “band” becomes “brand”

Difficulty saying longer words:

• Transposing letters: “animal” is “aminal;” “magazine” is “mazagine;” “suddenly” is “sundenly”
• Avoiding difficult words when speaking

The child’s silent voice disappears:

• He or she subvocalizes when reading silently, or needs to read aloud to understand a passage
• He or she needs to repeat the alphabet in his head when writing it out

Difficulty with speech, including:

• Trouble articulating many sounds
• Exhibiting language delay

Difficulty understanding verbal instruction:

• He or she needs to ask for directions to be repeated frequently
• He or she says “what” a lot
• An apparent hearing problem can mimic a focusing and attention issue. The key is determining whether the child really is not hearing and storing the information auditorally, or if the child is not focusing on what is being said.
• He or she is easily confused or is never quite sure he understood the speaker

Informal Evaluations

An auditory processing dysfunction can manifest itself in so many different ways. Many adults and children have mild auditory processing problems, but find ways to compensate for it in their daily lives. It is a bigger struggle for a child to learn with an auditory processing issue, than with just a visual processing issue, or a visual/motor (writing) processing issue. The left auditory brain hemisphere is responsible for retaining sounds, words, and auditory information. When this process is experiencing a block, the child doesn't know why he can’t remember what was just taught, nor does the parent.

Storing and retrieving information: Ask the child to write the alphabet. Observe carefully to see whether the child hesitates after writing several letters, then begins again. Watch for this hesitation throughout the writing of the alphabet.

If the child hesitates in writing a letter that follows a letter that has a directional component to it, such as “b,” “d,” “p,” “q,” “j,” “g,” then it could be that he has a spatial problem, and had to think about what direction the letter should be written. However, if the child hesitates after writing “e,” or “h,” then you can suspect that he has lost his silent voice…his “thinking” voice, and is having to go back and say the alphabet over and over in his head. With older children, you can ask if they had to say the alphabet over several times in their head while doing the alphabet, and they can tell you exactly where they felt they had to stop and repeat. The efficient storage and retrieval of 26 units is one sign of an auditory processing dysfunction.

Sequencing: Ask the child to say the days of the week, and then the months of the year. The months represent sequencing and ordering unrelated sounds. If this is difficult for the child despite being taught it before, or if the child leaves out some months (they often leave out either October or August, because they start with the same sound), assure him that many children do.

However, these difficulties could indicate that the auditory channel of sequencing is not working as well as it should, and causing your child to struggle with learning. If a child is laboring with auditory sequencing, then the popular way of teaching multiplication tables through skip counting will be more difficult for that child. That child would greatly benefit from using right brain teaching strategies, using the child’s photographic memory to memorize multiplication facts easily.

Word retrieval: The two brain hemispheres have individual responsibilities. When we understand these responsibilities we can see understand where a child’s processing